Thursday, September 27, 2007

what fatigue?

radiation and the window of the treatment's lingering side effects have come to a close and i feel pretty good. i've been steadily increasing my running and/or biking distances, although my radiation oncologist wanted me to recover for another 2 weeks before i start ramping up the intensity to an actual training level. through a new co-worker of mine i've received some inspirational words from butch davis [ unc's football coach who finished radiation / chemo treatments for non-Hodgkin's lymphoma ] as he shared that his valley has only served to strengthen his faith in God.

the toughest part of the entire treatment has probably been what i might refer to as the "not quite me" factor. although my hair has grown back [ curly by the way - ha ha ] and i can wear my normal clothes with all of the prednisone out of my system - i'm still not the same bryan. now this will be a true statement for the rest of my life but on a more superficial level - it'll just take time. this is where patience [ or a lack there of ] really starts to show. i've never really been out of shape during my life and to have to physically build back up to a level i worked pretty hard at maintaining can take its toll. also, on the inside my stomach and lungs are still a bit sensitive - the fact that i had to watch what i drank and ate during chemo was understandable but the slow and steady process of my body healing on its own is where the real frustration lies.

however, i am happy to report that my stomach aches have been getting better and i am seeing a steady improvement week to week when working out. it doesn't take more than one positive sign per trial i go through in order to get me pumped up.

so here we are - in remission and the only step left is to be cured. this patience thing seems to be a recurring theme - never forgetting that we live in today.

thank you to all of you for your thoughts and prayers - they mean so much to jen and i